Beware: Dating an AI chatbot may lessen your chances of finding love.
A new study from Match Group, the dating company behind popular dating apps like Tinder and Hinge, found that nearly half (47%) of the roughly 1,000 people ages 18 to 39 it surveyed “view AI in romantic contexts negatively.” And it’s a hard pass for most singles if you’re interested in AI companion apps, like Kindroid and Replika. Two in five singles aged 18 to 39 refuse to date someone who uses these apps, including over half (51%) of women aged 18 to 24, according to Match Group’s findings.
Online dating can feel sketchy, and using AI may not make it any easier. There are plenty of ways you can use AI on dating apps, like touching up your profile or figuring out what not to say to a new connection. While surveyed singles say they’re fine with using AI for everyday productivity tasks, they don’t want AI meddling in their love lives — especially as a romantic partner.
Most singles don’t want someone interested in an AI companion
AI is creeping into personal relationships more than in the past. Imagine going to ChatGPT to decide who is right in an argument with your spouse. Or even dating a bot. It’s not that far-fetched, given that there are AI apps that resemble personal relationships. Some even have avatars.
The Match Group survey found that dating an AI bot is a no-go for singles — four to one opposed. The survey found that only 12% of singles have tried companion apps in the past three months — mainly to try something new, not as a substitute for finding love. Most used them for boredom and entertainment (45%) and roleplay and simulation (43%). Fewer used AI to build a genuine connection (38%) or process emotions (26%).
“Dating is inherently human, and it’s not surprising that singles want their experience to remain grounded in real interaction between real people,” Chine Mmegwa, head of corporate development at Match Group, said in an email to CNET.
Instead of relying on bots, singles are getting advice from friends and family (60% respectively), whereas only 20% are using AI. That’s not surprising, considering a study published in March in the journal Science found AI is more likely to agree with you and less likely to help with things like repairing relationships. The study shows you may depend on AI more instead.
Michael Salas, a relationship therapist, agrees that seeking advice from family and friends rather than AI is a better move. Salas tested using AI on a complicated situation he was having with a friend, and the bot’s response may surprise you.
“It told me this friend clearly didn’t care about me. Verbatim, it told me this,” says Salas. “This wasn’t something I was even questioning, and I know it was wrong. When I told it that, it immediately course-corrected, told me I was right, and shifted to a new framework. That’s not wisdom.”
Salas advises being careful when using AI in dating. “I think you really have to be careful because it will take liberties and give advice that is incorrect or unwarranted. Save that for actual people who know you. Ask them instead.” Instead, Salas recommends using AI for editing and generating ideas, like ways to show someone you care — not as a substitute for humans.
Using AI for dating has limitations
Match found that most (74%) singles ages 18 to 39 use AI tools, such as ChatGPT, regularly. And 69% use AI for productivity tasks like summarizing, problem-solving and writing content. Most find their use of AI positive across several use cases. But not when it comes to finding love.
There are some exceptions. Over half (64%) can see AI helping them find love, including keeping a conversation going (27%), building a stronger profile (27%), starting a conversation (26%) and planning a date (27%). Some AI features already lean toward those preferences, like Tinder’s AI-powered matching that suggests connections based on your interests and camera roll (if you allow it). And there are date-planning apps, like the Date Idea Generator and My Spicy Vanilla. And Hinge debuted Convo Starters to ease the pressure of sending the first message.
It all still boils down to how comfortable singles feel about using AI to help with matchmaking. Based on Match Group’s survey findings, the percentage using AI assistance remains below half across many use cases, making it clear that most people don’t want bots meddling in their love lives. All in all, Mmegwa said that AI can be used to make dating safer and improve outcomes, but not without trust, authenticity and real-world connection.
Mmegwa said AI is affecting trust and safety through features like ‘Face Check‘ to ensure people are real and ‘Are You Sure?’ to keep interactions respectful.
“It should help people connect better in the real world. We’re focused on using AI to help daters know themselves better, generate better matches and improve outcomes across the experience,” Mmegwa said. “But the user should always feel like they’re in the driver’s seat. AI shouldn’t over-engineer connection or take away choice and personal agency.”
