It’s too hot to play video games.
But perhaps you want to try anyway.
May I recommend, then, a nice cold video game? Something frosty, chilly, that will invoke thoughts of snow, fresh cool water, and air conditioning? Maybe one that you could serve in a glass with some ice?
Well, I’d be delighted. Here, take a look at our menu. I make no promises about anything in any of these games, except that they will be very, very cold. Enjoy as much as you like, as many as you like. Just don’t get a brain freeze:
I Am Setsuna
PS Vita, PC, PS4, Nintendo Switch
An RPG intended to invoke Chrono Trigger nostalgia that happens to take place in a world where it’s always snowing everywhere. Literally the entire game is in a fantasy snow world. While this does not make for a whole lot of location variety, it does make for a very chilly experience.
SSX Tricky
PS2, GameCube, Xbox, GameBoy Advance
Tough to play if you don’t own an older system and a physical copy, but if you have one sitting around, maybe it’s time to dig it out. It’s a snowboarding game all about doing sick tricks while sliding down snow-covered mountains. And it has a sick theme song. Very cool.
Lost Planet 3
PC, PS3, Xbox 360
There are several of these third-person shooter adventure Lost Planet games, and they all take place on a planet in the middle of an ice age, so you’re guaranteed some good frost whichever one you pick up. Helpfully, all three games are on the same three systems, so it’s a bit easier to access the others if you liked one of them.
Tom Clancy’s The Division
PC, PS4, Xbox One
This wildly popular, decade-old shooter is still enjoyed by lots of people; there are hundreds of players on Steam alone right now. Its multiplayer elements are the most popular, of course, and you’ll have to have online connectivity to play, but that’s good news if your friends also want to beat the heat. The Division takes place in a snow-covered Manhattan right on the cusp of the holiday season, though given the in-game epidemic and resulting mass chaos I’m not sure you’ll be able to do much in the way of caroling or shopping. But at least it’ll be chilly out.
The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim
It’d be easier to list the consoles you can’t play it on
It’s Skyrim! The hit action RPG that’s on basically every platform ever and is, helpfully, very, very cold as long as you stay outdoors instead of inside one of its many cozy taverns. You can embrace the power that comes from being a Dragonborn, join the mage college, steal stuff, hunt for ancient artifacts or, like me, wander aimlessly through snowy forests, icy caves, and blizzard-covered peaks, fighting off wolves, picking lavender, and just enjoying the experience of existing in a wintery, mountainous, magical world.
SnowRunner
PC, PS4, PS5, Xbox One, Xbox Series, Nintendo Switch, Switch 2
Snow’s in the name, so you know it’s gotta be cold. If you’d rather move a little more expeditiously through the world than on foot as the Dragonborn, you can hop in a big ol’ truck and barrel your way through giant piles of snow in vast, chilly regions from all over the world. Like its less snowy kindred, SnowRunner is best-known for having incredible terrain simulation. It’s perfect if you don’t want just any ol’ snow, but are invested in realistic, textured snow that cakes up your wheels and shovels into big ol’ piles and makes a giant mess on the side of the road.
A Good Snowman Is Hard to Build
PC, mobile, Nintendo Switch
Another game about moving snow around, but uh, significantly simpler than SnowRunner. A Good Snowman Is Hard to Build is a puzzle about building a good snowman by rolling up balls of snow around obstacles in little hedge mazes. The only bad thing about trying to play this game in the summer is that its price on itch.io is tied directly to the weather in London. At the time I’m writing this, it’s $21.20, because it’s very hot there. If you buy this in the coldest parts of winter, it can get down to single digit prices, or even be free.
The Red Lantern
Nintendo Switch, PC
The Red Lantern is not just a cold game, it’s also got dogs in it. It’s about being a musher and driving a dog sledding team across Alaska, which means sledding across a lot of cold, snowy places. Giant ice lakes, frosty deep pine forests, dogs in little snow booties! Unfortunately for the musher, the cold is actively an obstacle. Fortunately for you, it’s 100 degrees out or something, and the cold can’t stop you.
Super Mario Sunshine
GameCube, Nintendo Switch
Wait, Reb, why is Sunshine on here?, you might ask. This is a decidedly hot game, not a cold game, you say. Well, you are correct! But I include Super Mario Sunshine here because it is a wonderful game of contrasts. Developer Bennett Foddy pointed this out to me recently in a conversation we had about this very game. Super Mario Sunshine is great at depicting hotness, because it’s so great at depicting coolness: the refreshing clear ocean water, the canals, the sprinklers, the fountains, FLUDD, all of it just feels so refreshing, in contrast to the incredible heat of the game. So if you’re willing to stomach just a liiiiittle more sunshine, you can join Mario and beat the heat by getting soaked. Figuratively. I mean, I guess you can play this while sitting in a sprinkler or something. I won’t tell you what to do with yourself when it’s this hot out.
